10 Jan Without title… Without words… In my own words

Wrote this only hours after giving birth, when still wide awake from the adrenalin

Much can be said about giving birth, or labour. And labour it is! I have muscle ache in my face, to illustrate… Forehead and chins to be exact. I’m not going into to details, but thought I should say something to remind my self how crazy and painful it was. Cause what is a fact, is that the whole pain experience is already fading from my memory, only hours after. And I catch myself already thinking, it wasn’t all that bad. I’m still here (even though I at one point thought to just leave the birth bed…telling them to manage the rest by themselves;), them bring my fiancée and the midwife) – this was as stage 3 started (push-contractions).

It is true that something else takes over. It like being in a trance, I argue if possible the most direct experience there is, highly spiritual (and painful) connection of some sorts. And I remember this strange exchange of thoughts flying between non-contraction moments where I’m thinking, ” let me rest”, ” I don’t wanna”, to peaking contraction where my free will seems VERY far in the back

Since first labour went quite fast 4,5 hrs, I was totally hoping for the same or even faster with nr two. Needless to say, that did not happen. It was without complications, but much longer as the water didn’t break. 18hrs from first contraction till delivery. I was praying within,” so help me God”, from 10th hr. And I made it, as so many women do – every time a miracle and the natural cycle of life. Every birth being as unique as there are women delivering.

And just like that, he was here <3 The biggest moment of relieve, holding our little bundle of joy in my arms.

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Breast feeding

So, this time around was similar it first time. In Norway there’s much emphasis on encouraging breastfeeding, and the time at the hospital preceding delivery is spent on ensuring both mom and baby learning how-to. Though, they don’t tell you that after the ca 3 days of raw milk, your breast will explode upon getting the real deal. And, for that coming week or so there will often be excruciating pain every time your baby latch on… Luckily my sister shared this information with me, and I was sort of prepared for it, and could better endure as I knew the pain would disappear within reasonable proximity.

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Maternity Tears

Second time around it’s apparently also normal to have more intense post-contractions, thus could also result in more intense hormonal waves. What is more normal than not is basically very individual, though hormonal fluxes will for sure keep you in a roller coaster from one emotion to the next (thereof e-motion like in-motion or inner motion;) ). I’ve indeed had my share already, and do feel this more expressive than last time (it’s impossible not comparing).

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Well, that’s a small recap of the first week. And now, we’re gonna enjoy. Energy turned inward…