29 Aug Mom, get your freak on! Or out…!?!!
A short reflection on the darker sides of being in long maternity leave (yes, I know we Norwegians are extremely fortunate being blessed with almost a year home with the baby, and I’m grateful, though there’s another side to it as well), as old sayings states ‘It requires a whole village to raise a child‘. In maternity leave you are also left to your solitude, with all benefits (as the introvert I am, yeay!) and implications it affords. In all the wonders of connecting with the baby, there are some not so great moments as well…
I’m loosing myself, drifting into a generic presence of motherhood. Patience, multitasking, pro-acting, hangryness-managment and general everyday logistics. I’ve lost myself. My me, my juice, my essence. But it seems that these tasks and does needs to be done. Must be done! All the time. In spesific manners that only I know the code of, not because they stay constant, but because I feel how they change…. Exhausting. Boring. Now, I’m throwing tantrums at my partner, my 3-year old would be proud! It’s ugly, I tell you. I turn ugly! Like Kali chopping the head of Shiva, I morbidly twist crazyness into co-co, Jack Nicholsen would give standing ovations!!! And then after, I too feel proud. Or released. Mastery of emotions. Or inner craze turning into rage, and then calmness.
Yoga becomes my harbour of regaining power, release of tension, perspectivizing, and simply joy. And more often than not I find myself upside down, literally!
What do you do when frustration and chaos is present?
Enjoy your weekend;)!